My September, My 6 boys.

I decided to stop this blog at last Tuesday midnight as I think it's really meaningless to write trashy words anymore. But I failed, coz I want to continue to write about my 6 doggy boys, Eddy (dead in 2002), Carter, Curtis, Cory (dead in Nov 2003), Casey, Ceska and my own life. At the end, it's my blog, Chet Chan's own blog, right? That's what I think finally.

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N's birthday is on the coming Monday, she told me she will go with her mum to their motherland (that they are Spainish-mix), from today to coming wednesday. Of coz I know it's not the truth. She goes trip with her one I know. I didn't told her that I know she's lying. I keep my mouth shut. She ask me if she can put Casey and Ceska in my flat. I answer Yes without second thinking, I miss Casey and Ceska so much I want to live with them for some days. Then, when I got back from work at 430am, I got up at early morning, to get Casey boy and Ceska boy. They miss me so much too. And now 4 brothers are on my flat. Though it's troublesome for other people, I feel really happy with them 4 (though they are really troublesome indeed...), especially when they lick me kiss me wholeheartedly. They are my good boy.

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This month, my bro has to take his last professional course, and I have to give him quite a lot of money to continue his ambition. I am his bro, of course I must give him all he wants. And my new wallet, which bought me from Japan from my best friend, has not much left. It's only the middle of the month, and my situation is not so good actually.

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I have told u all, that my 5-yr-old imac is very sick b4. He's better for last week, but I know he isn't. He died this week, exactly on Wednesday morning. Maybe he knows I may not need him anymore at home. Maybe he treats me so well that he allows me to copy all the data and files out before his real death. Anyway, he's dead, and he treats me well in these 5 years time. I must thank him.

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I read a lot these days. I read after I pull my exhausted body to my flat after work. I read before I sleep. I read when morning comes. I read when I am in MTR and taxi. I read Lawrence Block's fictions and I read Monster the comix. I enjoy them a lot, especially when I dont want to go out drink. I prefer drink by my own at my flat silently. One of my best friends send me the song "Firework at the end of the century" the canton pop song, and I am listening to it all the time.

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Many wordings I forget and some wordings I remember for life. The problem is, the wordings I remember very very clear in my mind, are all real bad wordings. I want to forget them all, but the harder I try to forget, the deeper I remember them all. I want them leave me totally, but seems they love me so much , stay with me and haunted me.

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That's a SMS I want to send out but I control myself and instead, I send to my own: I suddenly think of the night u wait me till 5am and felt asleep at the corner seat, I wake u up, that's a Saturday night. Then we take taxi to somewhere, u eat breakfast. It maybe happened in June 05. Or maybe I remember wrong. Or maybe I am drunk now it's just my imagine. I forget which version is true now.

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From the very first beginning till today, it's exactly 4 mothes time now. The starting time is 17/05/05 and it's already 17/09/05. Up and down, rollercoaster trip, and typhoon visits us today. Hope typhoon blows hard enough to erase everything completely, then rain heavily, then everyone is cleaned and has a new good start. Though I don't think I have such a luck to be cleaned completely myself.

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To grow, is to learn how to keep my mouth shut.

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Happy Mid-Autumn Festival, especially for the one who love Mid-Autumn Festival.