It's 75 days now from the first sms between us. Nothing have grown actually, no progress. It's hard for me to take. Sunday is not sunday for me.
I just re-assure pushing is of no use. U can't push a doggy to eat when he doesn't want, and u can't push the sun raise up at 4am when he doesn't want. It's the locus, it's the rule. And no matter how hard I try, I can't push her for any progress. Or precisely enough, how much I push, it wont have any result. Yes, I know well, and painfulness flows during weekends, repeatedly and seriously.
Friday nite she should me wif me, just me, coz what we did together have some results finally, I want to be wif her alone, to celebrate and to talk and to share. But we r not. I am alone. I wasted my nite wif someones whose of no importance. Got drunk and go home alone. Nothing more.
Sat morning I woke suddenly, just like those 75 days. Doggies licked me hard, to please me, to calm me down. But it still flows from heart towards my 10 fingers. I am woke by painfulness. I dont want it anymore. Am I that bad? Maybe yes.
And then my beloved Sun afternoon come. Still the same. And I know the cruel fact. It's nothing I can change. Good for me, maybe.
Hope Mon come fast. But even Mon comes, nothing is changed, I know, I know.
